Why We Feel the Science of Human Emotions

    There are six or seven main theraputic approaches to dealing with feelings that I have found in the literature so far. Why We Feel the Science of Human Emotions written byVictor S. Johnston clearly explains the theory that there is an evolutionary function of feeling and emotion in everything we do. His scientific approach gives us much food for thought.  Johnston postulates that feelings are key in the neuroscience of the brain.  He shows the biological link with a darwinian approach.  This provides important insights into the feelings that make us human.

     If we velieve that emotions are part of our biology, this book's premise works well for his idea that our predesigned dna make up creates a grand illusion for us to operate in the world.  He goes so far as to define attractive facial characteristics that encourage us to mate.  I find it cold and calculating, and I think there is more to the furtherance of the human race than the biology we inherit to create the way we experience the world. Perhaps our consciousness and emotions might even exist independent from our human body. I believe there is a spiritual aspect of feeling that is connected to our being on a solular level.  Designing a paradigm where we emote as a stimulus/response mechanism is very simplistic as complicated as he has made it seem.

  "So the questions remain: how does lifeless matter organize itself into a feeling? How do thoughts trigger emotions? How does external stimulation and its influence on our internal brain produce sensations like color, hearing taste, etc.? Can one eventually design a computer to simulate feelings to the point of actually feeling them? Other than imitation of our own feelings, how can we scientifically tell whether another human (or a computer) actually feels a sensation?

Although I hoped this book would answer these questions, Professor Johnston admits that we do not yet understand the mechanism of feelings (drat!). However, he does illuminate many of the reasons of why we feel based on an evolutionary approach (after all the title of the book addresses "why," not "how"). Johnston utilizes the results of brain research and describes the physiology of the limbic system (the feeling part of the brain), which appears consistent with a precursor to consciousness before higher thinking systems evolved in humans." (Jim Walker, Amazon Reviewer)

Gloria Wilcox and Dealing with Feeling

The emotional wheel is presented to us by many.  Different people label emotions in different ways depending on their paradigm.  Gloria Wilcox has a wheel that helps us release our negative emotions.    She has called upon spirit for answers about how to deal with feelings.  Her latest book Soothing Angels shows us how there are ways to cope.  We all have negative emotions from time to time.  If we can identify our feelings and learn how to reframe them we can heal our path to positive outcomes in our lives.  All of us have terrible things happen to us.  She gives us hope to deal with the roadblocks in our lives to make them instances of healing and learning by processes of coping. We can shift our lives and be centered. In this our inner can be enlivened and we will be more alive. There are so many happenings that can breed a lot of anger.  But, we can learn how to release this anger.  If we learn about empathy, and the soul our lives can be so much more dynamic and peaceful.  This author helps us release our blocks to joy.  When we endeavor to enjoy what we learn it will open us up and give us access to a wider range of emotion.  Take a look at how Gloria mapped out feelings on a wheel so others could navigate their own feelings.  Her work was Christ centered as her father was a minister.  Her vision is a beautiful organic process of being.  If enough people participate in this vision to release anger and bring more love into their lives all the time, perhaps we will have a golden era of love.

Feelings we Feel with our Body

Have you ever heard the expressions (cold feet, butterflies in your stomach, on pins and needles, hot headed, a feeling in the pit of my stomach)?  Why is it we relate certain feelings to various parts of the body?  In 2013 some Finnish researchers were asking themselves the same question.  Before we can understand how this happens, we need to find out what happens.  For their study, over 700 people were shown two silhouettes of bodies next to emotional words and pictures. They told them to mark in the areas on the outlines of the human body that they believed would give their own body a feeling. The results were impressive.  They found in general, people feel emotions in similar parts of their bodies.  This explains why we have such expressions in our language.  The body tends to react in some universal ways.  The next question will be to find out if we can find out how these physical sensations are triggered and why.  If you want to help with these studies you can participate in them yourself at http://becs.aalto.fi/~lnummen/participate.htm

Try it.  It might be fun!

Feelings of Belonging

            Last week my family was planning on going to a wedding when I found out my Step Uncle had passed away.  I was torn because I felt like I belonged to both of these wonderful families. I belonged to both of these groups who had validated and accepted me for who I am, and I wanted to do the same for them.  I chose to say goodbye to my Uncle, and then go to be with the next day celebrations with my husband’s family.  Both groups included me in their festivities and have nurtured my soul over the years. I have a theory that when life seems to be hectic and maybe even pointless, forging forward to connect to ones you are related to brings new meaning to your life. Belonging to these groups has taken some effort.  They were in Ohio and Indiana, and I was in Florida.  Lovingly they both engaged with my husband and I and acceptance us as a member or part of their groups. 

            As a daughter of divorce, my sense of belonging was challenged in my teens. My stepfamily invited me to make a square in their family quilt given to Grandma and Grandpa Emerick 36 years ago. That meant so much to me. That quilt was hanging on the funeral home wall. It inspired me to make a memory book for my husband’s parent’s fiftieth anniversary just one year ago.  Such a simple act of joining us all together to sew a quilt so many years ago for huge concept. It encouraged me to send a page of a memory book to each family member to celebrate the love of my new family. This loving act of making a quilt for my stepmother’s parents gave me sense of belonging that is a human need, just like the need for food and shelter. The presence of this quilt on this sad day that we had to say goodbye to one of the people who had sewn his presence into the fabric of this family gave me solace. 

            So many years ago each family member was given a square of fabric to decorate and sew together for a large expression of love from all. In this quilt I looked at Dan’s square and felt connected to Dan’s life and was more able to cope with the intensely painful emotions of saying goodbye. Of all the many ways to belong, I experienced this one knowing the circle of love in this family was still sewn together with love.  I had to leave the funeral with the memory book that my husband’s family members had contributed to for the wedding and anniversary celebration and my heart was still very heavy. How could I possibly switch gears and be happy? Gone were the adventures and gatherings that would include Dan. As sad as it was I still felt blessed by this connection and prayed that I would continue working at my connectedness to others.  Belonging is supposed to improve motivation, health, and happiness.  I felt my circle widened, and my soul felt deeper from these tender moments, but I could not honestly say I felt more motivated, or healthier, or happier. Yet this struggle of dealing with our grief was healed by the loving connections that still held.

Building a Sense of Belonging

            I really value being connected to others.  That is why we had been planning to go to this wedding and to celebrate my mother and father in law’s fiftieth wedding anniversary.  Every time we go to celebrate a time in joy of a wedding or a holiday I am impressed with the effort, and time the family in Indiana spends organizing one another to come together to encourage each other. One way they increase their sense of belonging is to look for ways we are similar with each other. They share wonderful stories of times passed and I love to listen to their experiences. It gives me a new understanding of my husband and his family. My husband and I are also struck by the interest they take in our family and what we are doing in our lives. We focus on common areas of interest.  This past visit, a cousin shared the family genealogy that she had researched. We were enriched by their differences, and renewed. 

            It is easy to accept the ideas of others, when you see their differences as a gift to bring you joy that enlivens your mind. When I walked into the wedding celebration after I had just been to a funeral it was hard to open my heart in joy.  Yet, I knew that this is what God wanted me to do.  Then as we bowed our heads in prayer the bride’s father mentioned the circle of love and life that God has sewn together for each and every one of us.  I thought of Ronmans 8:38  “And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,^[a] neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.”  I knew at that moment, that this, is where God is for me.  God was in each and every one of us there that day.  As hard as it was to accept others with happy open arms on that day, God was there and we were all witnesses to that circle of love that shall not be broken. There will always be views that are not the same as yours, but under that we are all connected.  The visit was glorious as the group continued to validate one another.  This built a sense of belonging and strengthened relationships. This is why the group still gathers. Validation is acceptance. Acknowledging each member of the group has grown a large family that supports and cares for one another.

            I am so glad I went to the funeral and the wedding.  I was with others I cared about and they cared about me.  I was blessed to be invited to these moments in life that are markers of the cycle of life that we are all part of.  To belong we must validate and accept others for who they are, and then they will do the same for us.  That is community. I hope to build more activities for my circle of friends in Florida and let go of my judgments and give acceptance and validation to others. Judgments can build walls. I ask myself what can I do to focus on people?  What can I do to validate others? How can I show others they are accepted in my circle? Connecting with others is far more important than our own individual likes and dislikes, for it sustains us.  It is where God’s love abides.